The Waterbed

Mom & Dad need to get their own bed. We OWN the waterbed. We spend 95% of our day sleeping on the waterbed. When we aren't eating or chasing squirrels or beagle wrestling we're sleeping on the waterbed. But when Mom and Dad are home they come in and sleep on the waterbed and it really messes us up. Chloe likes to sleep under all the pillows, but Mom and Dad like to sleep with their heads on top of the pillows, so then Chloe has to move. I like to sleep up near the pillows too. But when Mom & Dad are in the bed then I am too crowded and I have to move down to the foot of the bed. It's not fair. If possession is 9/10 of the law then the waterbed is ours. So Mom & Dad need to get their own bed.

Daylight Savings Time?!?!?

Maybe I can't read a clock, ..... well, OK, I can't read a clock, but I do know how to tell what time it is. I know what time I am supposed to get fed. It's 5 o'clock ... not 4 .... not 6... but 5! So how come every year at this time it gets switched on me? I start getting all excited and ready for my dinner and I know when it is TIME, but I don't get fed. I have to wait. Tonight Mom is sitting there at her computer and Chloe and I are trying to tell her it is TIME for dinner. We paw at her and do the I'm-hungry-dance, but she won't feed us. She keeps saying it's too early, like I know what that means. Then after FOREVER has passed, she finally feeds us. Why do we have to wait? Mom says it's because something called daylight savings time is over. I don't know what that is but I don't like it one bit.

Chloe is a PIG

Did I tell you I hate Chloe? Well I do. She is a pig. She wolfs her food down whole, and she always finishes eating way before me. I have much better manners. I chew each piece of my kibble and take my time. Sometimes I even get distracted by something and leave my bowl to go check it out. Tonight I left my bowl and Chloe ate all my food. I was so hungry and I wanted more food. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to tell Dad I was still starving. Then Mom came home from work. I barked and barked at her and ran into the kitchen and did my hungry dance. She asked dad if he had fed me. He said that of course he had. But Mom was watching me bark and dance around the kitchen and she knew I wanted something. So I hit the food container with my paw and knocked it over. Then I hit it again and danced some more. And then Mom and Dad finally figured out that I was hungry. So Mom gave me more food. Thank goodness! I thought for sure I was gonna starve to death. Chloe is a PIG!

Chloe is mean

Chloe is a bitch. I hate her. She is mean and she doesn't share. Mom bought us some cow hooves to chew on. Chloe didn't like them but I sure did. I have been chewing and chewing and chewing on them. Then just when I get it chewed down to a nice size Chloe steals it. I couldn't steal it back because Chloe is mean and she snaps at me and I am afraid of her even though I am bigger than her. I went and told Mom. Mom gave me a new chew toy. She gave me a rawhide bone. I liked that too. I was chewing on it a lot and then I got distracted by a noise in the yard and I went outside to see what it was. When I came back in Chloe had stolen my rawhide chew too. I hate her.